Learn how to be happy according to science, get started by applying the 7 habits of happy women to your life.
How to be happy is a simple question that even science tries to answer. Seems that the answer is not that simple since according to science, happiness is more than feeling joy and pleasure. Happiness is more nuanced and complex than that, says award-winning professor Dacher Keltner, UC Berkeley. Daniel Kahneman, Nobel prize winner, psychologist, and economist defines in his research also different forms of happiness.
Hence, happiness really takes hard work for most of us. Some of us are lucky enough to be born with the right genetics and happiness comes easy to them. Crazy, right?
However, for most of us to be happy is comparable to be in shape. We need to exercise, to watch what we eat and to control ourselves. Thus, we need tools and practices to pursue happiness. So, how can we apply insights from science into our daily lives and be happy again, if something kicked us off the balance?
What is happiness?
First things first. What is happiness and what makes us happy? Certainly, this is a question everyone needs to answer for himself. For centuries, people are defining the term – from ancient Greeks, through Buddhists to today’s psychologists.
However, if you want to be happy, you need first to define what is happiness for you, so that you can achieve it.
When for example, someone says I’m happy, on a general level, it could mean that my well-being is good, my life is going well. But it could also mean, that I’m just an enthusiastic person and I’m genetically predisposed to feel happy. By the way, those same genes make you feel optimistic. In that case, happy is a personal trait. However, happy could mean also a specific emotion that I’m feeling right now – I’m feeling for example gratitude and warmth. Likewise, happy could be just a sensation, when something feels good – like a massage or touch.
Science concludes, that most of the people understand happiness on a general level. Happiness is similar to what makes people satisfied with their lives. It’s having the sense that your life is meaningful.
HOW TO BE HAPPY AGAIN ACCORDING TO SCIENCE?
According to science, you can pursue happiness, when you practice these 7 things on a daily basis, especially if you are a mom:
1. Nurture your relationships
Science suggests, that one of the most important and enduring sources of happiness is social connections. Family, romantic partnerships, friendships.
According to science, very happy people tend to spend little time alone. Thus, they tend to have strong, rich and satisfying relationships. Interestingly, one of the things that are most strongly connected to happiness is talking to friends and family. So, science concludes, that people are happiest when they around other people.
In other words, mix and mingle with people you like and nurture your relationships daily.
2. Be compassionate and kind
Likewise, science suggests, that being compassionate, kind, generous, makes you happy. When you think about the well-being of others and relieve the suffering of others, you fundamentally and inherently make yourself happy. Similarly, volunteering leads to greater feeling of satisfaction.
Hence, try to practice compassion, kindness, and generosity on a daily basis.
3. Learn to cooperate and reconcile
We, humans, exist to connect, to be kind, generous, to think about the well-being of other people. Thus, science suggests, that developing this capacity will boost our own happiness. For instance, when we work together in order to create a benefit for an entire group, we feel happier than when we work only for our own benefit.
“Strange is our situation here upon earth. Each of us comes for a short visit, not knowing why, yet sometimes seeming to a divine purpose. From the standpoint of daily life, however, there is one thing we do know: That we are here for the sake of other men —above all for those upon whose smile and well-being our own happiness depends, for the countless unknown souls with whose fate we are connected by a bond of sympathy. Many times a day, I realize how much my outer and inner life is built upon the labors of people, both living and dead, and how earnestly I must exert myself in order to give in return as much as I have received and am still receiving.”
― Albert Einstein, Living Philosophies
Accordingly, trusting, establishing trust in others, apologizing, forgiving are behaviors that we need to adopt daily for a happier life.
4. Practice Mindfulness
Science defines mindfulness as the awareness that arises by paying attention on purpose in the present moment and non-judgmentally. What that means is that we observe our own mind in a way that doesn’t make a judgment about what we’re feeling, or thinking is right or wrong, or good or bad. We just need simply to be present. Simply put, mindfulness is the presence of the heart.
There are lots of ways to practice mindfulness and you can choose anything that makes you feel good and comfortable. It can be yoga, meditation, eating, or just standing outside and feeling the wind and the sun on your skin. You can practice mindfulness in any situation every day.
Without a doubt, one of the most powerful happiness practices, that’s accessible to everybody is just to have a very clear awareness of your breath.
So, take a few minutes a day, and observe your breathing while being present with your heart.
5. Be Grateful
Research suggests that gratitude is a complex emotion with strong social and psychological functions and it is fundamental to happiness. According to science, gratitude is not just a simple thank you or being polite. Gratitude is the feeling of reverence for things that are given. Gratitude is the glue that ties people. So, gratitude is really something you feel every day for things that other people do for you and things that are given to you. But it does not end with this.
Gratitude leads us to do good, make us more generous, kind, and compassionate. When we are grateful, we are more forgiving, we tend to help others. Science suggests, that gratitude has the power to do 3 things – to heal, to energize and to change lives.
In conclusion, thankfulness for life is a fundamental life orientation.
How to practice gratitude every day? In the first step, we need to affirm that there are good things, benefits, gifts that were given to us. We need to affirm that life is good. In a second step, we need to figure out where this good come from. There is someone to give thanks to. In a third step, we need to express our gratitude and to be good people and help others.
6. Practice Self-compassion
Science does not see a difference between compassion for self and others. Self-compassion has the components of a sense of kindness, care, understanding for yourself versus judgment, feeling isolated and cut off from others.
Self-compassion is not about self-improvement or trying to do more, to be more, so you can have a better picture of yourself. It is really about self-acceptance and self-love.
Happy people are kind to themselves, accept themselves and are their own best friends.
7. Develop Mental Habits of Happiness
Sometimes, we’re our own worst enemies, when it comes to being happy. We can slip into patterns that make us feel bad, depresses, anxious. Those are difficult to avoid and sometimes, we even do not notice, that we slipped into.
Therefore, we need to discipline our minds and establish habits and ways of looking at the world which are good for us, for our health and happiness. In other words, training our mind and really cultivating more healthy patterns of thought, is the key to feeling happy.
7.1. Avoid toxic patterns of thought
According to science, we should be mindful and alert to toxic patterns of thought that can really cost us in terms of happiness. Toxic thoughts can be perfectionism, comparison to others, materialism. Similarly, a mindset of always maximizing, wanting more, better, as much happiness out of it as possible, makes us unhappy, because we have more regrets. Because we have less satisfaction with life and tend to be more depressed.
Happy people just don’t have these toxic thoughts.
7.2. Adopt an optimistic mindset
We all can train our mind for happiness and delight in our current situations. How? By adopting an optimistic mindset. We should truly believe and expect that our future holds for us is good. We should be happy for all the good little things that happen to us every day and remember them as good experiences. Moreover, make your good experiences intense as possible, feel them in your mind and body for as long as possible. Finally, sink into this experience, internalize it. It will become a happiness source you can take with you wherever you go. According to science.
Well worth to try out.
Do you want to know the 7 secrets of attractive women? Read here.